Currently offering In-Person and Telehealth Visits
Schedule a free 15 minute consultation: lauri@lauriobrienlcsw.com
In our work, you’ll discover why it became so natural to focus outward not inward, why it made sense to prioritize others in the past—and why it’s so hard to stop now.
Through insight, new skills and practices, and turning your superpower of high attunement back toward yourself, you can begin to loosen the grip of OVERfunctioning.
You are more than your usefulness to others. Your value is in who you are.
Are you tired of being the one who holds everything together?
Would you call yourself a people pleaser?
Do you often feel responsible for the emotions of others?
Are you trying to get someone in your life to change or appreciate you more—but they don’t, so you just try harder?
Maybe it feels like your ability to feel okay is directly tied to someone else’s mood. You’re so focused on the needs of others that, when you finally stop to check in with yourself, you don’t even know what you want or need. Over time, resentment, anger, anxiety, or depression start to creep in—the harder you work, the worse you feel.
You may be OVERfunctioning in your relationships.
What once helped you feel secure, loved, and connected…isn’t working anymore.
Adaptations like OVERfunctioning are skills that you developed to get your needs met or avoid conflict. At one point, they probably worked. But now it may feel like you’re constantly “on,” with your lens pointed outward—scanning for what everyone around you wants from you. You are last on your own list, if you make it on there at all. Cue perfectionism burnout.
Additional Areas of Focus
Trauma
“Trauma comes back as a reaction, not a memory.”- Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolk.
Trauma isn’t only what happened to you, it is also the things that didn’t happen. These traumas affect us all in different ways and influence how we relate to ourselves and others. As children, we develop skills to help us to adapt and survive in our environment. As adults, we may find that the skills that we learned are no longer serving us. Therapy can help you to identify these patterns and “reactions” and develop a more mindful, authentic path forward.
Life Transitions
“It is when we are in transition that we are most completely alive.” -William Bridges
Whether it is a transition that you are seeking, or one that you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy, change brings uncertainty. We tend to get caught up on the elements that are not in our control. It’s easy to focus on the outcome and miss the opportunities for growth, insight and different possibilities. Therapy can help you to make decisions that make sense for YOUR life journey.
Anxiety
“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will” -Epictetus
Most of us can relate to feeling anxious from time to time, but what if it is getting in the way of your ability to sleep, work, or relate to others? Therapy can help you to manage anxiety by learning to understand your core beliefs, challenge negative thoughts, and build mindfulness and grounding practices. Addressing your anxiety can help you to improve emotionally, mentally and physically.
